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The Daily Bonnet

Welcome to Steinbach, Parade Capital of Canada

July 29, 2016 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Steinbach, Manitoba, founded in 1874 by Russian Mennonites, has grown from a tiny village on an insignificant stony creek into a booming metropolis of nearly 15,000 people where anyone and everyone is free […]

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Mennonite Heritage Village Anticipates Thousands of Pokemon Go Players This Weekend

July 29, 2016 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Despite being particularly slow adopters of new technology, the Mennonites of Southeast Manitoba have not been immune to the Pokemon Go phenomenon. In fact, the Mennonite Heritage Village in Steinbach, which hosts its […]

Unger Conviction

Area Church Votes to Become Gossip-Affirming

July 28, 2016 Andrew

BURWALDE, MB In a bold move of support and respect for the dozens of gossips in the congregation, North Burwalde Mennonite Church has become the last church in town to become officially “gossip-affirming.” “I know that everyone else […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Insists on Wearing Suspenders to Nude Beach

July 27, 2016 Andrew

PATRICIA BEACH, MB Sun-lovers at a Lake Winnipeg clothing-optional beach were a little shocked this weekend as Delbert Krahn, from the West Reserve, was unwilling to remove his suspenders before taking to the waters. “I don’t never […]

Unger Conviction

Six Billion Year Old Bible Provides Definitive Proof of Evolution

July 26, 2016 Andrew

SANLIURFA, TURKEY Scientists at a dig site in Turkey have uncovered one of the most important pieces of evidence to support Charles Darwin’s theory of evolution. Earlier this month a team of specialists led by […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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