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Unger & Thirst

Thousands Line Up for CMU’s Annual Farmer Sausage Blowout

April 27, 2023 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB The lineup at CommonWord stretched more than three miles down Shaftesbury Blvd. this week for CMU’s annual farmer sausage sale. “We’re Canadian Mennonite University’s bookstore and resource centre so naturally we have a […]

Unger Suspicion

Tucker Carlson Discovered Knacking Zoat in Jeans Shorts at the Pits

April 25, 2023 Andrew

GRUENHIMMELFELD, MB It seems that Fox News star Tucker Carlson has settled in very nicely to his new role as half-drunk guy in cutoff jeans shorts at the pits. Moments after being fired by the […]

Headline Contest

Select Your Favourite Headline for this Photo

April 24, 2023 Andrew

Thank you to everyone who entered and try again next week if your headline didn’t get chosen. We received a large number amount of entries this week, but we can only pick 3 finalists. Congrats […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman Tapes ‘Antiques Roadshow’ Over Hockey Game

April 23, 2023 Andrew

BOISSEVAIN, MB Area farmer Pete Thiessen was ready to sit back with a couple Bud Lights  Lab Lites and watch the hockey game when he discovered that there was something wrong with his VHS tape. […]

Unger & Thirst

Béchamel Sauce Revealed to be Nothing More than Schmaunt Fat

April 21, 2023 Andrew

PARIS, FRANCE The white roux known as béchamel sauce has been revealed to be nothing more than the Russian Mennonite peasant dish known as schmaunt fat. The revelation sent shockwaves across the haute cuisine community. […]

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