Thrift Store Runs Out of Speedos as Temperatures Soar this January

RIVERTON, MB

The weather has been so unseasonably warm this winter, that Mennonite men of all stripes and sizes have been stripping off their overalls and hitting the beach.

“Normally I’m ice fishing this time of year,” said Pete Kroeker of Riverton. “But Tina said I needed to work on my tan anyway.”

For Earl Buhler of Rosenort, however, the weather has been a little problematic.

“I haven’t had a chance to get into my beach bod,” said Buhler. “Although Pastor David did a whole sermon series about how all bodies are beach bodies, so…”

The local thrift store has run out of speedos as a result of the demand.

“Oddly enough we’re all out of overly revealing European swimwear, but are completely stocked up with long johns.”

Those wanting to watch Mennonite men in Speedos, or even participate, are asked to meet at the beach in Gimli this Sunday after church.

(photo credit: None. You’re welcome)

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