Manitoba’s Vaccine Passport Only Good for Trips to Costa Rica


Manitoba’s new vaccine passport will provide fully vaccinated individuals with unrestricted travel to absolutely everywhere in the whole world between Nicaragua and Panama. 

“Costa Rica yet? Oba, not even Vankla?” said a disappointed Mrs. Siemens of Steinbach, who just got her second shot on Monday. “Oh, well, I guess that’s just as well.” 

Fully vaccinated individuals will have a whole host of additional privileges including the freedom to attend football games, movie theatres, and PC party fundraising dinners.

“I think we’re pleasing everyone with this,” said Premier Pallister, already boarding his flight at James Armstrong Richardson International. “I mean who wouldn’t want a tropical beach vacation these days? I’m sure, like most Manitobans, it’s been literally months since we’ve been to our private beach resorts in Costa Rica.”

In an effort to dispel any appearance of impropriety, Pallister explained precisely how the location of Costa Rica was chosen.

“I spun a globe and wherever my finger landed, that county got approved,” said the Premier, boarding his flight. “I’m sure everyone is glad I didn’t plunk my finger down on Cleveland or something.”

Pallister says he’ll be making very good use of the vaccine passport over the next 6 to 8 months.

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