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Unger Games

Unger Games

Jantsied Beats Ditsied for First Time in 26 Years

April 27, 2024 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Oba jo, that was quite the Turnbull Cup as the Jantsied Flyers defeated the Ditsied Pistons 4 games to nothing yet once. “Nah, jung, you finally did it,” said Abe Janzen of Jantsied. […]

Unger Games

Matt Rempe Insists He’s Not a Rempel

April 22, 2024 Andrew

NEW YORK, NY The heroics of young New York Rangers centre Matt Rempe this weekend had folks, especially Mennonites, scratching their heads in puzzlement. “When I saw that in the Free Press, I thought for […]

Unger Games

Thousands Gather in Winnipeg for Wite-Out Party

April 21, 2024 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Streets are closed for several blocks surrounding the South Kildonan EMB Church this weekend as thousands are expected to gather for the first annual Wite-Out Party. “We’re correcting all the errors in the […]

Unger Games

Mennonites Concerned About Catching ‘Indiana Fever’

April 16, 2024 Andrew

INDIANAPOLIS, IN Mennonites across Indiana this week are concerned about the spread of something called the Indiana Fever. “That’s all I see on the news,” said Mrs. Bauman. “Indiana Fever this and Indiana Fever that. […]

Unger Games

Salt Lake City NHL Team Unveils New Uniforms

April 14, 2024 Andrew

SALT LAKE CITY, UT Just days after announcing that the struggling Arizona Coyotes would be relocating to Salt Lake City for next season, the Utah-based team has already unveiled their snazzy new uniforms. “We’ve got […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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