WINNIPEG, MB On Friday afternoon, thousands of Manitobans were startled with an emergency alert on their phones warning them that Brian Pallister is still in charge of things around here. “Waut de schissjat is this […]
EDMONTON, AB Just moments into the first period of game one, the Edmonton Oilers were already up three games to none on the lowly Winnipeg Jets. “Well, that wraps up the first period of play […]
ELKHART, IN A local man who gets all his information from memes he sees on social media has publicly declared that he has absolutely no use for “mainstream media.” “Ach, they’re all biased,” said Mr. […]
GRAND FORKS, ND Local man and constitution-worshipper Henry Unger says he just “can’t believe the Mormons have all these extra holy books that they added centuries later.” For Unger, it’s just the Old Testament, New […]
THUNDER BAY, ON After nationwide protests saw a “disturbing” presence of neck tattoos, bleach-blonde hair, and mirrored sunglasses, the Government of Canada issued a new health advisory requiring “all douchey neck tattoos” to be fully […]
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