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Unger Suspicion

Unger Suspicion

Mennonite Woman Selects Taylor Swift to Take Home Best Picture at the Grammy’s Tonight

March 10, 2024 Andrew

LOS ANGELES, CA The stars are arriving in Hollywood tonight for the 96th annual Grammy Awards. For Mrs. Martens of Saskatoon, this means she’ll be frantically trying to fill out her ballot. “It’s hard to […]

Unger Suspicion

Taylor Swift Announces New Album: ‘Tortured Mennonite Poets Department’

March 3, 2024 Andrew

WEST READING, PA Pop sensation Taylor Swift is venturing into new territory on her forthcoming 11th album – tortured Mennonite poets. “Of all the poets out there, I think the Mennonite poets are the most […]

Unger Suspicion

Winnipeg Woman Breaks Longstanding Vow Never to Leave the City with Visit to Pool in Steinbach

March 2, 2024 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Winnipeg woman Anne Pankratz has been perfectly content with her suburban Winnipeg lifestyle, never needing to leave the city for any reason whatsoever. That is until she found out about the existence of […]

Unger Suspicion

Seniors Start New Baby Boom to Overtake Millennials

February 21, 2024 Andrew

LEAMINGTON, ON A recent Stats Canada study has revealed that Boomers are no longer the dominant generation and are now outnumbered by Millennials. In order to address this concerning trend, Boomers have begun utilizing several […]

Unger Suspicion

Huge Crowd for Kate Bowler has People Thinking Taylor Swift is in Town

February 15, 2024 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Area man, Peter Dueck, 71, ventured into the city from Winkler this afternoon and decided to enter Grant Park Shopping Centre via the convenient McNally Robinson entrance. Unfortunately for the bewildered Dueck, he […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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