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The Daily Bonnet

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The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman Amasses World’s Largest Collection of Plastic Bags

July 19, 2022 Andrew

LINDEN, AB Area woman Doris Froese has been collecting plastic bags from the grocery store since they were first introduced in the mid-1980s. “And I’ve never thrown out a single one,” said Froese. “They’re super […]

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The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Moves Back and Forth Between Canada and Mexico a Record 37 Times in a Single Week

July 18, 2022 Andrew

CAMPO TRES B, MEXICO Local man John Wiebe has just set a new Mennonite migration record by moving back and forth between Mexico and Canada 37 times in a single week. “I started in Winker […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Left in Awkward Position After Neighbouring Passenger Falls Asleep on His Shoulder

July 15, 2022 Andrew

GOSHEN, IN On a flight from South Bend to New York City this week, local man Arthur Yoder was left in a really awkward position after a neighbouring passenger fell asleep on the Mennonite man’s […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Spends All Day Fighting with Automatic Paper Towel Dispenser

July 14, 2022 Andrew

WATERLOO, ON Mr. Eby of Waterloo spent more than 6 hours at his local Walmart this afternoon trying to get the automatic paper towel dispenser to recognize him. “It’s worse than milking a cow,” said […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man’s Sexy Overalls Declared “Stumbling Block”

July 11, 2022 Andrew

TABER, AB Starting this week, Mennonite men throughout Alberta have been asked to refrain from sporting shit-covered overalls and rubber boots as they’re seen to be a “stumbling block” for single women in the area. […]

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