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The Daily Bonnet

Your trusted source for Mennonite satire.

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The Daily Bonnet

Local Bible College Records First Nasty Breakup of the Year

September 1, 2024 Andrew

MOOSE CURRENT, SK It didn’t take until the end of the first Intro to New Testament class for Moose Current Bible College to record its first nasty breakup of the year.  “Not sure why we […]

The Daily Bonnet

Theology Prof Accidentally Lectures Physics Class

August 31, 2024 Andrew

ABBOTSFORD, BC Pleased to see a full lecture hall full of students ready for his talk on the consubstantial nature of the trinity, Dr. Warkentin was a full 40 minutes into the class before Physics […]

The Daily Bonnet

Man Who Lived Near a Mennonite Town for a Couple Years in the 80s Now Internet’s Top Expert on Mennonites

August 29, 2024 Andrew

LONDON, ON Area man Steve from London, Ontario has taken it upon himself to spout off his knowledge about Mennonites every chance he gets. “Any post about Mennonites and I’m there commenting,” said Steve. “After […]

The Daily Bonnet

Radical Mennonite Woman Pairs Sausage with Potatoes

August 20, 2024 Andrew

DALMENY, SK In a radical departure from centuries of Mennonite tradition, area woman Ruth Plett, 51, decided to throw a ring of formavorscht in with the potatoes this Tuesday afternoon. “I didn’t feel like pinching […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Makes it Big on Broadway … Winnipeg

August 19, 2024 Andrew

WINNIPEG,MB It has been the lifelong dream of Altona’s Darren Loewen to make it on Broadway. Loewen caught the bug after playing Tevye in W.C. Miller Collegiate’s 1996 production of Fiddler on the Roof. “I’ve […]

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