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The Daily Bonnet

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The Daily Bonnet

Editorial: Should Steinbach Separate From Canada?

June 30, 2016 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB I’ve taken a break from scrolling Tinder while my wife is at Superstore to talk to you about values. Yes, values. I mean the traditional Mennonite values of free-market ‘every man for himself’ capitalism, […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mother-of-the-Bride Insists on Having “The Talk” Moments Before Daughter Walks Down the Aisle

June 25, 2016 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB After neglecting to say anything at all about the topic over the past twenty years, concerned mother Brenda Harms waited at the doors of the Steinbach Gospel Mennonite Church for her daughter to […]

The Daily Bonnet

City Media Seeks Rural Folks Willing to Make Sensationalistic Comments on Camera

June 23, 2016 Andrew

CALGARY, AB Always looking for an entertaining story that paints Taber with a wide brush, media outlets from the provincial capital have issued an open casting call for any Taber folks willing to go on […]

The Daily Bonnet

Every Single Street in Steinbach to Go Under Construction Simultaneously…and Reverted to Gravel

June 22, 2016 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Construction crews are out in force in Steinbach, stripping the pavement from every single street in town at the very same time. “Once we’ve stripped the concrete off,” explained crew leader Paul Froese, […]

The Daily Bonnet

Sloth Emerges Victorious in Mennonite Dance Competition

June 20, 2016 Andrew

ASUNCION, PARAGUAY The competition was fierce at the International Mennonite Dance-Off in Asuncion, Paraguay this past week. While Arturo Penner was able to hold his own through four rounds of competition, in the end it […]

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