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The Daily Bonnet

Your trusted source for Mennonite satire.

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The Daily Bonnet

Ten Dollar Donation in 1987 Leads to Lifetime of Junk Mail from Local Charity

December 14, 2020 Andrew

GOESSEL, KS A trivial donation in the late 80s has led to a lifetime of junk mail for a Goessel, Kansas couple. “Ugh, Henry, here it is again,” said Mrs. Friesen, sorting through her junk […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mannanite Man Still Searching for the ‘Alf on the Shalf’

December 12, 2020 Andrew

TABER, AB “Mannanites” love their Christmas traditions from tutes to plumemoos and everything in between. In recent years, however, the holiday traditions have modernized a little. “I really look farward to waking ups avery marning […]

The Daily Bonnet

Winkler Man Caught Walking Around Morden in a Speedo

December 8, 2020 Andrew

MORDEN, MB Emboldened by Morden’s reputation for liberalism, Winkler man Peter Schellenberg, 63, jogged down Stephen Street this afternoon wearing nothing but a Speedo and a smile. “Waut de schissjat is that yet?” said Mr. […]

The Daily Bonnet

B.M. Friesen and Sons Electrical to Rebrand

December 7, 2020 Andrew

ROSENORT, MB Since the early days of the rural electrification program in Manitoba, B.M. Friesen and Sons has been a household name in the Scratching River settlement. Now, however, the company has decided to rebrand. […]

The Daily Bonnet

Steinbachers Claim Massive Grey Obelisk has Been there for Decades

December 6, 2020 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Eager to get Steinbach back on the front of the paper this week, Winnipeg media outlets passed through town looking for something, anything, they could report on. And, lo and behold, on the […]

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