LAKE WINNIPEG, MB A 43-year-old man from over by Reinland somewheres was found beached on the shores of Lake Winnipeg this weekend. Thankfully locals were able to keep him hydrated with Rogers Golden Syrup while […]
ALTONA, MB After being warned to stay away from the sunflower plants, thousands of Winnipeg hipsters have descended upon corner stores and gas stations across southern Manitoba to have their pictures taken next to bags […]
ABBOTSFORD, BC Days after the 3-D printing of Mennonite recipes was legalized by the Supreme Court, Mr. Klassen of Abbotsford successfully printed every single recipe in the Mennonite Treasury Cookbook and promptly divorced his wife […]
The body mass index is used to measure a person’s relative health based on their weight and height. Unfortunately, the traditional BMI does not work for Mennonites. Instead, Mennonite doctors recommend that you use the […]
STEINBACH, MB Miss Liz Bergen, 29, had initially thought of asking her new friend Ashley from church to meet her at Sawney Bean’s pub for a pint of Guinness, but decided to play it safe […]
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