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Unger Conviction

Unger Conviction

Americans Left Completely Religionless as Sports Shut Down

March 14, 2020 Andrew

PHILADELPHIA, PA Millions of Americans have been left without a religion to call their own as all the professional sports leagues on the continent have shut down due to the pandemic. “Well, I guess I’m […]

Unger Conviction

First Mennonite Church Shall Become Last

March 11, 2020 Andrew

ROSENHOF, MB In an effort to appear more humble the First Mennonite Church of Rosenhof is changing its name to the Last Mennonite Church of Rosenhof. “We’re proud of how humble we are,” said Pastor […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Church Sets Record By Standing Up and Sitting Down 600 Times in a Single Service

March 9, 2020 Andrew

MOUNTAIN LAKE, MN The East Side Mountain Lake Mennonite Church set a world record this Sunday after Pastor Ron had the congregation stand up, sit down, and stand up again 606 times in a single […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Man Leaves Generous Tip of Two Gospel Tracts

March 5, 2020 Andrew

KIDRON, OH A waitress at a coffee shop in Kidron was excited by the generous tip left by one of her patrons this morning. After ordering two slices of toast and a glass of orange […]

Unger Conviction

What Happens if We Use Google Translate on Our Favourite Mennonite Hymns?

March 1, 2020 Andrew

I’m sure we’ve all tried Google Translate once in a while. Much to my chagrin it does not have a Plautdietsch option. But maybe that’s okay because we all know that it doesn’t work 100% […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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