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Unger Conviction

Unger Conviction

North Kildonan Gets its Own Area Code

March 22, 2022 Andrew

NORTH KILDONAN, MB Manitoba is about to get its third area code. Starting next month, all residents of the Mennonite enclave of North Kildonan will be given the area code 606, “just to make it […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonites Baptized in Low German Forced to Do it Over Again in High German

March 14, 2022 Andrew

HENDERSON, NE A bunch of Friesens will have be rebaptized this week after it was discovered that Pastor John had been using Plautdietsch when he should have been using High German. “Everyone knows the Bible […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Church Releases Brand New List of Sins for 2022

March 8, 2022 Andrew

AYLMER, ON Mennonites have been marking this day on their calendar for months – the day when their local church releases the new list of sins for the year. “The kids, especially, are really excited. […]

Unger Conviction

Man with Snowblower Finds Renewed Sense of Purpose and Meaning

February 26, 2022 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Local man Abe Broesky, 53, recently experienced a renewed sense of spiritual purpose in his life all due to the fact he happens to own a snowblower. “Sometimes I think to myself, ‘Abe, […]

Unger Conviction

Winkler Area Church to Meet in Bouncy Castle

February 22, 2022 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Having outgrown the capacity of a nearby storage shed, a Winkler area church has decided to relocate the entire congregation to a bouncy castle they’ve inflated on the Kroeker yard. “Oh, look, a […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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