The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

Articles by Andrew

Unger & Thirst

Congregation Votes to Continue Serving Raisin Buns at Funerals

October 22, 2016 Andrew

BLUMENORT, MB Tempers flared at the Mennonite church last night, after rogue elder Gunther W. Thiessen put forward a motion to replace the traditional funeral raisin buns with store-bought dinner rolls. “Some of us don’t like […]

The Daily Bonnet

Renowned Mennonite Scholar Unable To Locate Car In Parking Lot

October 21, 2016 Andrew

HARRISONBURG, VA World-renowned expert on the Anabaptist exegesis of the synoptic Gospels, Dr. Dirk W. Thiessen, is always able to find minute errors in the works cited pages of undergraduate papers, but was unable to locate […]

Unger Conviction

College and Career Glow Bowling Event Results in Record Number of Hook-Ups

October 20, 2016 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Local College and Career leaders are excited about the significant increase in young men and women hooking-up after a recent glow-bowling event. “It’s really nice to see relationships form like that. That’s what this group is […]

The Daily Bonnet

Lonely Planet Releases 600-page Guide to Blumenort

October 19, 2016 Andrew

BLUMENORT, MB Just in time for the winter tourist season when snowbirds flock to Blumenort to bask in the sunshine and nearby gravel pits, Lonely Planet has released an extensive guide book to the small […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Lady Claims Annual Quilt Auction is ‘Rigged’

October 19, 2016 Andrew

ALTONA, MB After failing to get the winning bid at the last five church quilt auctions, Mrs. Donna Toews, 71, of Altona is now claiming that the whole system is rigged. “I’ve got evidence – I […]

Posts pagination

« 1 … 675 676 677 … 712 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Documentary Filmmaker Subsists on Nothing But Faspa For an Entire Month
    July 25, 2016
  • Mennonite Family Looking Forward to Delightful Illegal Gathering this Easter
    April 1, 2021
  • Liquor Store Strike Leaves Mennonites Without Any Place to Judge Each Other
    July 29, 2023
  • Morden and Winkler Tired of Having to Share a Hospital
    September 16, 2019
  • Mennonite Man Opts for Incontinental Breakfast
    October 16, 2023

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2025 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved