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Articles by Andrew

Unger Games

Winnipeg Goldeyes Take Over First Place in American League Central

July 11, 2023 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB After months of speculation about who would emerge as the dominant team in the lowly American League Central, an unexpected victor has emerged – the Winnipeg Goldeyes. “Finally, someone in that division is […]

Unger the Influence

Pierre Poilievre Debuts New Mennonite Look

July 10, 2023 Andrew

LINDEN, AB Conservative leader Pierre Poilievre felt his current look was “just not conservative enough” and debuted a lovely new Mennonite beard this week. “Kind of a miracle really. Took me just three days to […]

Headline Contest

Mennonite Woman Bikes Around the World for Children Without Access to Roll Kuchen

July 10, 2023 Andrew

Congrats to this week’s winner Justina Bergen! Every once in a while, The Unger Review will provide a photo in need of a headline. At the end of the week the top 3 headlines, as […]

Unger the Influence

Daring Young Women Brave Enough to Wave Canadian Flag in Nation’s Capital

July 9, 2023 Andrew

TORONTO, ON Two young women, Beatrice Penner, 21, and Agatha Plett, 24, braved the streets of Toronto earlier this week to show off their nation’s colours. “I was worried people would think we were the […]

The Daily Bonnet

Hottest Day in History Has Mr. Friesen Considering a Name Change

July 8, 2023 Andrew

ROSTHERN, SK Days after scientists reported the hottest day in the earth’s history, area man Dick Friesen is considering changing his name to “more accurately reflect the current state of affairs.” “Diewel, it’s hot out,” […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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