The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

Month: September 2022

The Daily Bonnet

Local Bookstore Sets Up “Meet a Real Mennonite” Booth

September 29, 2022 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Winnipegers were given a rare opportunity to “meet a real live Mennonite” at a local Indigo store this past week. “I’m very excited. It’s not every day I get to meet a real […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Launches New Streaming Service Called “Schputify”

September 28, 2022 Andrew

LA CRETE, AB Jack Rempel of La Crete, Alberta has just launched a new “streeeming servass for Mannanites yet.” “Since it’s a Mannanite thing and we don’t use the Internets, we’ll be bringing records and […]

Unger Suspicion

Nickelback Frontman Insists He’s Really a Kroeker

September 27, 2022 Andrew

HANNA, AB Lead singer of beloved Canadian rockers Nickelback has come out this week and said he’s actually much more of a Mennonite than we ever suspected. “Mench ek saj! You’ve been pronouncing and spelling […]

Unger Suspicion

Local Gas Station to Offer Free Eye-Gouging or Kick in the Groin with Every Purchase

September 26, 2022 Andrew

VANCOUVER, BC Gas stations across Vancouver are going the extra mile this week by providing each paying customer with a complimentary eye-gouging or kick in the groin. “We’re trying to stand out from the crowd […]

Unger & Thirst

Daring Mennonite Couple to Try Costco Farmer Sausage

September 25, 2022 Andrew

VANAPAG, MB This evening at faspa, the Wiebes of Vankla will be the first ever southern Manitobans to eat the farmer sausage that, apparently, you can get at Costco. “Costco formarvorscht? I didn’t even know […]

Posts pagination

1 2 … 6 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Mennonite Swifties to Exchange ‘Frintschoft’ Bracelets this Weekend
    November 16, 2024
  • Hollywood Actor Presented with Annual “Even More Self-Righteous than a Mennonite” Award
    February 11, 2020
  • Tucker Carlson Admits He’s Just Been Doing Really Shoddy Satire for the Past 20 Years
    May 17, 2024
  • City of Winkler to Stage Massive Publicity Stunt to Compete With Steinbach
    July 23, 2016
  • Mennonite Farmers Excited for Bountiful Papsi and Ravel Crop this Year
    June 28, 2020

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2025 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved