The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

Month: January 2019

The Daily Bonnet

Miracle-Working Techno-Whizz Grandson Turns Computer Off and then On Again

January 21, 2019 Andrew

ABBOTSFORD, BC Nineteen-year-old Timothy Brandt had all the Mennonites at the Abbotsford Manor in awe last night after he turned off the computer and turned it back on again. “Oba yo! He really knows about […]

The Daily Bonnet

Manitoba Man Missing Wide Range of Body Parts After Spending Frigid Winter Night Staring at the Moon

January 20, 2019 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Local man David Peters froze into a solid block of ice this evening as he stood outside in -30 degree temperatures trying to look at the lunar eclipse. Local doctors managed to thaw […]

Unger Games

Loewen Family Totally Destroys Dueck Family

January 20, 2019 Andrew

HOLLYWOOD, CA The Loewen family of Kleefeld totally destroyed the Dueck family of Plum Coulee this past week on the popular game show ‘Family Feud.’ For the Loewens, the victory was seen as sweet revenge […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Woman Accidentally Attends English Service After Sleeping In and Missing German Service

January 19, 2019 Andrew

ROSENORT, MB For the first time in her life, Mrs. Johan Klassen of Rosenort attended a “worldly church service” in the English language. After a late night of canasta with the girls, Mrs.  Klassen slept […]

Unger & Thirst

“I Could Make it Myself Better and Cheaper”: Mennonite Woman Refuses to Buy Anything at Church Bake Sale

January 18, 2019 Andrew

GRUNTHAL, MB While examining the offerings at the Grunthal Church fundraising bake sale this week, Mrs. Kehler refused to buy a single item, claiming that everything she saw she “could easily make at home much […]

Posts pagination

« 1 2 3 4 … 7 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • New Winkler Costco to Open Up on West End of Winnipeg
    February 16, 2025
  • Doug Ford Accidentally Shuts Off Power to the Amish
    April 16, 2025
  • Local Abes Rush to Purchase Last Remaining Chocolate Letter A
    January 4, 2024
  • Generous Mennonite Couple Sends Used Tea Bags to Missionaries
    November 20, 2017
  • Facebook Rolls Out New ‘Disapproving Mennonite Grandma’ Reaction Button
    May 3, 2020

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2026 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved