Mennonite Woman Refuses to Watch Hockey Until the Oilers Stop Streaking


Concerned about protecting the purity of her household, area woman Nita Dyck has forbidden her entire family from watching any more Edmonton Oilers games until this “streak” is over.

“Everyone is talking about streaking at Oilers games,” said Dyck. “Well, I don’t care what these worldly people are into. As for me and my house, we will not be watching such filth.”

Dyck said she shut off the television set sometime around the fifth of sixth game of the streak.

“Apparently, it just keeps on going and going,” said Dyck. “There’s nothing stopping this streak. I don’t know why the authorities don’t take charge of the situation. The last thing my Harry needs to see is hockey players streaking.”

Dyck is very disappointed that the entire city of Edmonton seems to be so enraptured with streaking.

“These people need to go back to church,” said Dyck, “where they’ll learn a thing or two about dressing modestly.”

Dyck said she’s very opposed to streaking, though she’d make an exception for that “dreamy” Connor McDavid.

(photo credit: IQRemix/CC)

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