The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About The Unger Review
  • Andrew Unger

Month: February 2018

Unger Conviction

8% Tithe Now Acceptable Due to Economic Downturn

February 6, 2018 Andrew

MOUNTAIN LAKE, MN After a slumping economy and soaring unemployment rate, the Society for the Proliferation of Mennonite Churches has determined that “an 8% tithe will be acceptable for the foreseeable future.” The change was […]

Unger Suspicion

Tom Brady Blames Loss on Regulation Size Footballs

February 5, 2018 Andrew

MINNEAPOLIS, MN New England Patriots Quarterback Tom Brady struggled to explain his team’s loss in Super Bowl LII last night, though after pressure from reporters, confessed he felt he was hampered by having to use […]

The Daily Bonnet

5 Things Mennonites Can Watch Instead of the Super Bowl

February 4, 2018 Andrew

The Daily Bonnet has teamed up with our friends over at Mennotoba to create this list of viewing alternatives to the Super Bowl. So while all your frintschoft are in the living room pretending to […]

Unger Suspicion

‘O Canada’ to Be Replaced with Crash Test Dummies Lyrics

February 4, 2018 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON After a week long public consultation process that included chatting with random dudes on the Internet, Ottawa has decided to update the national anthem for the 21st century by using lyrics from a […]

Unger & Thirst

Buns Discovered in Mennonite Grandma’s Freezer Carbon Date to 5 Million Years Old

February 3, 2018 Andrew

TABER, AB A bag full of frozen raisin buns discovered at the back of Grandma Wiebe’s freezer this past week were taken to a University of Alberta laboratory to undergo rigorous scientific testing including carbon […]

Posts pagination

« 1 … 5 6 7 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Mennonite Woman Consults ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ for Wardrobe Advice
    February 15, 2017
  • Whose Mennonite Mom Makes the Best Perogies?
    May 13, 2018
  • Trudeau Shopping for New Cabinet at IKEA
    March 5, 2019
  • Mennonite Church Lifts Television Ban Just in Time For that New Menno Sitcom
    January 3, 2024
  • Legendary Hip-Hop Group Run EMC to Reunite for Annual Church Convention
    July 2, 2016

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2025 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved