The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About The Unger Review
  • Andrew Unger

Month: August 2017

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Lady Uses Google Earth to Spy on Neighbours

August 31, 2017 Andrew

BLUMENGART, MB Mrs. Kleinsasser of the Blumengart area has discovered a fancy new tool to find out all the latest news about the neighbours: Google Earth. Ever since being shown the online tool by her […]

The Daily Bonnet

Your Free Mennonite Horoscope for Today

August 30, 2017 Andrew

IF TODAY IS YOUR BIRTHDAY Oba, you are one lucky Mennonite. Be open to receiving whatever frozen mystery item Grandma Penner might pull out of the freezer and attempt to microwave for you. You will […]

The Daily Bonnet

Henderson Highway Permanently Closed to Motorized Vehicles

August 29, 2017 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Henderson Highway, in the heart of Winnipeg’s famed Anabaptist Quarter, is being permanently closed to motorized vehicular traffic this week after a request from concerned members of the Mennonite community. “We’re tired to having to […]

The Daily Bonnet

7 Signs that Mennonite Man is Just Not that Into You

August 28, 2017 Andrew

Ladies are always looking to hook up with an eligible Mennonite man. There’s just something about the hands of a man who catches chickens for a living that’s simply irresistible to a lot of gals. […]

Unger Games

Mennonite Man to Challenge Floyd Mayweather

August 27, 2017 Andrew

LAS VEGAS, NV A Mennonite man from rural Kansas is set to become the first ever pacifist boxer this fall in a bout against world champion fighter Floyd Mayweather. Dale Friesen, 37, says he has […]

Posts pagination

1 2 … 8 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Health Officials Worried About New More Infectious Jantsied Strain
    February 9, 2021
  • Englisher So Hairy He’s Mistaken for a Mennonite
    April 17, 2020
  • Justin Trudeau Suffers Embarrassing Case of Premature Election
    August 15, 2021
  • “Greta’s Been Coached,” Says Politician Who Doesn’t Even Write His Own Speeches
    September 28, 2019
  • Local Church to Host Weekly ‘Superspreader Potluck’
    October 16, 2020

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2025 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved