The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About The Unger Review
  • Andrew Unger

weight

The Daily Bonnet

Donald Trump Labelled ‘Morbidly Obese’ After a Few Plates of Mennonite Food

May 21, 2020 Andrew

WICHITA, KS House Speaker Nancy Pelosi is attributing Donald Trump’s “morbid obesity” to a recent visit he took to Russian Mennonite country in Kansas, where he reportedly consumed three heaping bowls of komst borscht, fifteen […]

Unger & Thirst

Local Woman Gains Ten Pounds Just By Looking at Mennonite Food

August 21, 2019 Andrew

GRUNTHAL, MB Local woman Patricia Redekop found herself a little heavier this afternoon after merely glancing at the Tupperware container of leftovers that Mrs. Kornelsen brought to work. “There were eight cottage cheese perogies and […]

Unger & Thirst

A Calorie Guide to Mennonite Cooking

September 16, 2017 Andrew

In the days before we became lazy and assimilated, Mennonites wouldn’t concern themselves with such things. We worked hard all day on the farm, where we could easily sweat out even the very fattiest of […]

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Police Seize Massive Stockpile of Knitted Hangers
    October 5, 2017
  • Abbotsford Family Subsists All Summer on Blackberries Picked By the Side of the Road
    July 28, 2023
  • Mennonite Woman Accused of Wearing Makeup After Lipstick is Found on Husband’s Collar
    November 3, 2018
  • Americans to Consume More than 2 Million Tons of Baked Beans Today
    July 4, 2023
  • Joke Crosses the Line Yet Again Today
    September 7, 2017

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2023 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved