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The Daily Bonnet

Slow-Moving Mennonite Backs Up Traffic on the Yellowhead for Miles

October 9, 2023 Andrew

FOAM LAKE, SK Dave Epp was somewhere halfway between Saskatoon and Winnipeg this weekend, when he realized that for some strange reason there was a trail of cars behind him. “Waut de schissjat is going […]

Unger Suspicion

Winnipeg Man Gets Out of Parking Ticket By Claiming He Was “Protesting”

February 10, 2022 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Local man Harold Dyck has just been granted a full pardon and solemn apology from the Premier after mistakenly been given a parking ticket when he was clearly “out there protesting injustice or […]

Unger & Thirst

Area Man Mistakes Freedom Convoy for Timmies Line

January 27, 2022 Andrew

THUNDER BAY, ON Local man Dan Friesen, 51, was heading out for his daily double-double and chocolate cream glazed, when he entered what he thought was just the regular Timmies line. “I thought nothing of […]

The Daily Bonnet

Niverville Vows to Overtake Steinbach for Most Number of Traffic Lights

March 21, 2020 Andrew

NIVERVILLE, MB With its first traffic light forthcoming this summer, the town of Niverville is eager to surpass rival community Steinbach for the title of most traffic lights in the Southeast. “Sure, we’ve only got […]

The Daily Bonnet

Enns Family Gets Their Own Special Crossing

September 27, 2019 Andrew

KLEINSTADT, MB The tiny Mennonite village of Kleinstadt, Manitoba has just unveiled a series of road crossings intended to serve the crossing needs of the Enns family. “There are so many Ennses around here, we […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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