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The Daily Bonnet

Friesen Population Set to Pass 8 Billion ‘Any Day Now’

August 18, 2022 Andrew

ALTONA, MB According to a UN study, the Friesen population is projected to reach 8,000,000,000 within days. The Friesen Population Clock was at 7.97 billion this week and statisticians are on pins and needles waiting […]

The Daily Bonnet

Morden to Pass Winkler in Population By the Year 2056

February 14, 2022 Andrew

MORDEN, MB At the current rate, Manitoba’s fastest growing city, Morden, will pass rival community Winkler in population by the year 2056, the same year that Mennonite astronauts are set to colonize Jupiter. “Just do […]

The Daily Bonnet

10 Amazing Facts About Mennonites According to the 2021 Census

February 12, 2022 Andrew

Statistics Canada has just released the results of the 2021 census and there are many startling revelations about the country’s Mennonite population. Let’s have a look! Average Mennonite net worth: 73 acres of flax and […]

The Daily Bonnet

Ten Amazing Mennonite-Related Google Trends Charts

April 3, 2018 Andrew

We’ve all recently discovered just how much information Google is tracking about us. Even Mennonites yet! So, I decided to use the compare function on Google Trends to see what was happening in the world […]

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More from the unger review

  • Conservatives Run Actual Donkey in Mennonite Town, Still Confident of Victory
    October 17, 2019
  • Mennonite Church Sells New ‘What Would Jansen Do’ Bracelets
    April 21, 2019
  • Mennonite Church Hands Out Fidget Spinners to Keep People Alert During Boring Sermon
    June 4, 2017
  • The Top Ten Best Pandemic Pick-Up Lines
    May 5, 2020
  • Aylmer Pastor Awarded Nation’s Highest Honour: A Stained Dirty Star on Canada’s Walk of Fame
    March 28, 2021

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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