The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About The Unger Review
  • Andrew Unger

sports

Unger Conviction

Magnus Carlsen Booted Out of Church for Wearing Jeans

December 30, 2024 Andrew

WATERTOWN, NY Norwegian chess superstar Magnus Carlsen had decided to try his hand at a Dutch Blitz tournament up in Watertown, New York this week, when he realized his attire was not suitable for the […]

Unger Games

Mike Tyson to Fight Mennonite Man Named Jake Pauls

November 15, 2024 Andrew

FRESNO, CA A paperwork mixup has boxing legend Mike Tyson set to square up against Fresno area farmer Jake Pauls tonight. “Yeah, when I got the note in my church mailbox, I thought, ‘oba, it […]

Unger Games

Mennonite Player Suspended for Calling Opponent a Lutheran

November 14, 2024 Andrew

AYLMER, ON Colin Dueck of the Aylmer SpitZoats hockey team has been suspended until the end of the month due to a particularly heated chirp he threw at an opposing player. “He called him a […]

Unger Games

Blumenort ‘Menno Knights’ Forced to Change Team Name

November 13, 2024 Andrew

BLUMENORT, MB 6-time EM Cup champions the Blumenort Menno Knights are no more. This after the label “Mennonite” (or anything close to it) was labelled “offensive” by hockey authorities this week. “We’re going to think […]

Unger Games

Hockey Player Suspended 5 Games for Calling Jonathan Toews a ‘Mennonite’

November 12, 2024 Andrew

WINKLER, MB After an unseemly incident in London, Ontario this week, the NHL has decided to ban players from calling Mennonites Mennonites. “What’s next? Someone’s going to call Jonathan Toews a Mennonite? Oba nay!” said […]

Posts pagination

« 1 2 3 … 41 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Mennonite Family Absolutely Loves Their Brand New ‘EMC Sierra’ Truck
    December 18, 2019
  • Introducing the All New Mennonite Enneagram!
    April 9, 2019
  • Winnipeg Police Seize Mennonite Woman’s Basket of Chanterelles
    May 21, 2023
  • Abandoned Pizza Hut Serves as Lasting Monument to Human Ingenuity and Indigestion
    March 4, 2024
  • Mennonite Bureau of Investigations Raids Indiana Mansion
    August 14, 2022

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2025 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved