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rock music

Unger Suspicion

Deceased Mennonite Man Shocked to Encounter Ozzy Osbourne

July 24, 2025 Andrew

HEAVEN Pastor David Thiessen, who passed away more than 30 years ago, was shocked to discover that heavy metal icon Ozzy Osbourne had joined him in Heaven this week. “I’m more than a little surprised, […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Church Hires Coldplay to Help Spot the Sinners

July 20, 2025 Andrew

LA CRETE, AB Attendees at a local Mennonite church will be on their best behaviour from now on as the church has blown their entire budget to hire English rock band Coldplay to help identify […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman Has Already Planted 25% of a Simon and Garfunkel Song

July 3, 2025 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Area woman Olga Sawatzky, 61, is very impressed with her garden this year and says she’s especially excited to be one-quarter of a popular Simon and Garfunkel song. “Not that I listen to […]

Unger Suspicion

Festival to Feature New Chilliwack Cover Band Called Abbotsford

May 9, 2025 Andrew

ABBOTSFORD, BC They’re the hottest Chilliwack cover band on the circuit and they’re heading straight for the main stage at the Fraser Valley Mennonite Brethren Festival of Music and Arts this weekend in the Clearbrook […]

Unger the Influence

Rolling Stones Announce New More Youthful Lead Singer Joe Biden

July 21, 2024 Andrew

LONDON, UK It didn’t take long for President Joe Biden to find a new job–lead singer of legendary rock band The Rolling Stones. “You can’t always get what you want and Mick was getting long […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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