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rock music

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Buys Back All the Albums He Was Forced to Burn in the 70s

August 10, 2026 Andrew

SWIFT CURRENT, SK It’s taken him more than four decades, but local music fan Steve Goosen has finally re-purchased all the albums he tossed on the bonfire at that fateful youth retreat back in 1979. […]

Unger Suspicion

Reitmans Introduces New ‘Angine de Poitrine’ Line

August 9, 2026 Andrew

MONTREAL, QUEBEC In an effort to appeal to a younger hipper audience, Canadian clothing retailer Reitmans has recently introduced a new Angine de Poitrine line of polka-dotted blouses and skirts. “I never knew Reitmans was […]

The Daily Bonnet

Fans Petition Rock and Roll Hall of Fame to Induct Paraguayan Harpist Eduard Klassen

April 18, 2026 Andrew

STRATFORD, ON Another year has come and gone and once again legendary Paraguayan harpist Eduard Klassen has been left off the list for induction into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. “It’s outrageous,” said […]

Unger Suspicion

Robots Caught on Kiss Cam at Björk Concert

July 31, 2025 Andrew

REYKJAVIK, ICELAND It was an embarrassing moment for two androids at a Björk concert this week, as they were caught in full embrace on the kiss cam. “I really don’t like to embarrass people or […]

Unger Suspicion

Deceased Mennonite Man Shocked to Encounter Ozzy Osbourne

July 24, 2025 Andrew

HEAVEN Pastor David Thiessen, who passed away more than 30 years ago, was shocked to discover that heavy metal icon Ozzy Osbourne had joined him in Heaven this week. “I’m more than a little surprised, […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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