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The Daily Bonnet

Frugal Mennonite Man to Live ‘Rent Free’ in Another Man’s Head

October 11, 2024 Andrew

KITCHENER, ON Area man Dave Eby, 43, has just stumbled on an amazing new plan to avoid paying rent in the exorbitant southern Ontario housing market. “It all started in the church lobby with Mr. […]

Unger Suspicion

Abbotsford Woman Mortgages House to Pay for Taylor Swift Tickets

November 5, 2023 Andrew

ABBOTSFORD, BC As soon as Taylor Swift announced her upcoming Vancouver shows, area woman Megan Berg was on the phone with the loans department at her local credit union. “The house is worth 2.3 million, […]

Unger Suspicion

What a $5 Million House Looks Like in Toronto

June 25, 2023 Andrew

TORONTO, ON With interest rates rising and the housing market starting to cool, realtors are now calling it a buyer’s market. Nowhere is this more evident than in Toronto where a mere $5 million will […]

Unger Games

Toronto Couple Sells Small Empty Lot to Buy 40% Stake in the Maple Leafs

September 23, 2022 Andrew

TORONTO, ON Toronto school teachers, Pamela and Andrew Doerksen, have just sold a small empty Danforth lot for $990 million and used the money to buy, like, 40% of the Toronto Maple Leafs. “I had […]

The Daily Bonnet

Family Sells Modest Bungalow in Abbotsford to Live Like Kings in Winnipeg

September 4, 2022 Andrew

ABBOTSFORD, BC The Janzens have just sold their modest 1100 sq. foot bungalow in Abbotsford and are using the funds to live like kings the rest of their lives in Winnipeg. “Even when you factor […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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