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marriage

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Seeks Wife to Stare at While She Does the Yardwork

November 14, 2025 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Area man Matthew Klippenstein, 37, has just posted an ad in the local paper looking for a sturdy young woman who hasn’t dyed her hair, pierced her ears, or grown unaccustomed to a […]

The Daily Bonnet

Friesen-Friesen Engagement Tops the News in Mennonite Town

August 26, 2025 Andrew

HERBERT, SK In the small town of Herbert, Saskatchewan, there was no bigger news this week than the engagement of local librarian Taylor Friesen and lentil farmer Travis Friesen. “Everyone’s posting about the engagement all […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Couple Celebrate Anniversary By Splitting Meal at Chicken Chef

August 24, 2025 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Local couple, Bill and Anne Kliewer, will be celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary this week by sharing a 3 piece meal at the local Chicken Chef. “What’s 15.95 divided by two?” wondered Bill. […]

Unger Conviction

Dual Headstone Eagerly Awaits Death of Spouse

August 23, 2025 Andrew

KORN, OK When Jake Penner passed away in 2008, his wife Martha promptly had her own name added to the headstone in anticipation of her eventual demise. “But it’s been 17 years and I’m still […]

Unger Suspicion

Daring Mennonite Couple Get Married on Long Weekend

August 3, 2025 Andrew

SASKATOON, SK Laura Sawatzky, 22, and Nick Barkman, 23, tied the knot this long weekend to a completely empty church. “Even our witnesses didn’t show up,” said Laura. “Apparently they would rather be at the […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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