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marriage

Unger Suspicion

Daring Mennonite Couple Get Married on Long Weekend

August 3, 2025 Andrew

SASKATOON, SK Laura Sawatzky, 22, and Nick Barkman, 23, tied the knot this long weekend to a completely empty church. “Even our witnesses didn’t show up,” said Laura. “Apparently they would rather be at the […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Church Hires Coldplay to Help Spot the Sinners

July 20, 2025 Andrew

LA CRETE, AB Attendees at a local Mennonite church will be on their best behaviour from now on as the church has blown their entire budget to hire English rock band Coldplay to help identify […]

Unger Conviction

Area Man Supports “Biblical Marriage” By Obtaining 700 Wives and 300 Concubines

June 11, 2025 Andrew

AUGUSTA, GA Staunch “Biblical literalist” Dave Wright, 61, has finally accomplished his goal of living out the model of marriage as clearly established in the Bible. “I’ve been collecting wives over the past few years […]

Unger Conviction

Bible College Now Offering Shorter 6-Month MRS Degree

March 13, 2025 Andrew

TWO MOUNTAINS, AB Two Mountains Bible College is pleased to announce that starting next year they’ll be offering a shorter MRS program that can be completed in just six months. “We found that not everyone […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman Quickly Cleans the House So Guests Don’t Learn the Truth

March 8, 2025 Andrew

ROSENORT MB When the Sawatzkys visit the Pletts, they’re always impressed with how immaculate everything is. The floors are spotless, the toilet bowl is glistening, there’s not a speck of dust anywhere. “I don’t know […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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