The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

manspreading

Unger Suspicion

Pope Francis Bans Death Penalty; “Except, of course, for manspreaders,” he says

August 7, 2018 Andrew

VATICAN CITY Pope Francis modified centuries of church teaching this week by calling for the near complete abolishment of the death penalty, except for “particularly heinous crimes such as manspreading and those freakin’ annoying guys […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Deacon Arrested for Manspreading Across Entire Church Pew

August 24, 2017 Andrew

KIDRON, OH Mennonite deacon Delbert Nussbaum, 81, was taken into custody by Kidron Police this past Sunday after churchgoers complained that the elderly man had manspread across an entire pew during the morning’s service. “What […]

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Panic Strikes Bible Camp After Tuck Shop Runs Out of Doritos and Pepsi
    July 31, 2019
  • Mennonite Man Storms Out of Jazz Club, Claiming “Far Too Much Sax”
    November 16, 2017
  • Mennonite Man Earns Place in Heaven after Attending Evening Service
    February 25, 2017
  • ‘Acting like an idiot’: Mennonite Driver Clocked at Just 2.32 km/hr on Trans-Canada Highway
    October 19, 2018
  • Mennonite Family Consumes One Last Watermelon Before Switching to Pumpkin for the Next 8 Months
    September 28, 2024

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2026 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved