The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About The Unger Review
  • Andrew Unger

knackzoat

Unger & Thirst

Pigeon With Backpack Full of Knackzoat Caught at BC Prison

January 10, 2023 Andrew

ABBOTSFORD, BC Abbotsford Correctional Services are investigating after a pigeon with a backpack full of delicious dill pickle-flavoured sunflower seeds with found at the Fraser Valley MB Prison this week. “It appears that someone on […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Man Hasn’t Knacked Zoat All Year

January 3, 2023 Andrew

WINKLER, MB After decades as one of Winkler’s top zoat knackers, area man Art Harder, 71, is really proud of himself for resisting the urge to knack zoat all year. “Things were getting out of […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Man Tucks His Beloved Ronnie’s Into Bed For the Night

July 30, 2022 Andrew

WINKLER, MB After decades of searching for love with no success, local man Arnold Hiebert, 63, has finally found his lifelong companion. Arnold is now officially betrothed to a bag of Ronnie’s Jumbo dill pickle […]

Unger & Thirst

Faint Line Indicates Presence of Knackzoat in the Blood

April 24, 2022 Andrew

WALDHEIM, SK Mr. Derek Wiebe of Waldheim, Saskatchewan is just one in a long line of local residents who’ve tested positive for knackzoat in recent weeks. “I waited the full 15 minutes and it was […]

The Daily Bonnet

From Knackzoat to Plumi Moos: Five Amazing New Gifts in MCC’s Annual Christmas Giving Guide

November 15, 2021 Andrew

Christmas is a time of giving and generosity. Ever year at Christmas, the MCC offers folks the chance to choose items to donate from their gift giving guide. In addition to old favourites like wells, mosquito […]

Posts navigation

1 2 … 6 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Municipality Approves the Sale of Hash Brownies at Church Bake Sales
    November 9, 2017
  • Mennonite Woman Devours Entire Advent Calendar One Week In
    December 9, 2019
  • Child With Eyes Open During Prayer Spots Child With Eyes Open During Prayer
    November 9, 2021
  • Mennonite Woman Scores Big on ‘Wheel of Fortune’
    October 21, 2017
  • ‘Huge Adele Fan’ Discovers She’s Actually Been Listening to Lauren Daigle for the Past Five Years
    May 16, 2022

SATIRE BY ANDREW UNGER, AUTHOR OF THE DAILY BONNET

Copyright © 2023 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved