The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About The Unger Review
  • Andrew Unger

kansas

Unger Suspicion

Joe Biden to be Replaced with Napping Mennonite Man

December 7, 2021 Andrew

GOESSEL, KS After a tight vote in the US Senate, President Joe Biden has been ousted and will be replaced with a half-asleep Mennonite man from just outside Goessel, Kansas. “Shhh, you don’t want to […]

The Daily Bonnet

Newton’s “World’s Tallest Mennonite” Drafted by Golden State Warriors

March 4, 2021 Andrew

NEWTON, KS Hailing from Newton, Kansas, the 17-foot limestone Mennonite Settler statue known across the globe as the “World’s Tallest Mennonite” has finally reached his true calling: playing center for the Golden State Warriors. “After […]

The Daily Bonnet

Why is the Mennonite Town of Goessel, Kansas Shaped Like a Gun?

February 22, 2021 Andrew

GOESSEL, KS For some strange reason the pacifist Mennonite town of Goessel, Kansas has managed to fashion their town in the exact shape of a Colt M1911 pistol. “It’s a mystery to me,” said local […]

The Daily Bonnet

Joel Wiens Stadium Replaces Reimer Stadium (Yes, this is real and, no, it’s not in Manitoba)

February 15, 2021 Andrew

HILLSBORO, KS Residents of southern Manitoba were mortified to discover that the Mennonites of Kansas had one-upped them in naming stuff after Nikkels, Wienses and Reimers. “Waut de schissjat is going on down there at […]

The Daily Bonnet

Ten Dollar Donation in 1987 Leads to Lifetime of Junk Mail from Local Charity

December 14, 2020 Andrew

GOESSEL, KS A trivial donation in the late 80s has led to a lifetime of junk mail for a Goessel, Kansas couple. “Ugh, Henry, here it is again,” said Mrs. Friesen, sorting through her junk […]

Posts pagination

« 1 2 3 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Steinbach Water Tower to Feature Glass Bottom Viewing Area
    July 18, 2018
  • Mennonites Flock to Reopened MCC Store to Buy Bigger Pants
    June 12, 2020
  • Handwritten Recipe Has Mennonite Children Scratching Their Heads
    February 19, 2019
  • Mennonite Man Buys a Round of Tap Water for the Whole Bar
    March 11, 2019
  • Loewen Family Totally Destroys Dueck Family
    January 20, 2019

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2025 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved