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The Daily Bonnet

Federal Liberals Enlist the Amish to Address Housing Crisis

August 23, 2023 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON Fresh from high level cabinet meetings, the federal Liberal party has come up with a brand new plan to address the nation’s housing crisis–hire the Amish. “I’m sure they can raise a few […]

Unger the Influence

Protestors Excited that Trudeau is Finally Single

August 2, 2023 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON For a few years now, thousands of Justin Trudeau’s most passionate admirers have taken to the streets with signs that, albeit rather crass, nevertheless have expressed their undying love for the Prime Minister. […]

Unger the Influence

Liberals Update Passport to Include Sausages from Across Canada

May 23, 2023 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON Fears that the new Canadian passport would be a little too bland for the tastes of Canadians were proved to be unfounded this week after the Liberal government revealed a new sausage-filled passport. […]

Unger the Influence

Mennonites Worried Trudeau is Trying to Seize their Buns

February 18, 2023 Andrew

VANKLA, MB Mennonites across southern Manitoba have been greatly distressed over the past few months upon hearing the news that Trudeau is planning to take away their buns. “Ach! That Trudeau! This is exactly what […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Potato Farmer Proclaims Himself “Dyck Tater for Life”

November 26, 2022 Andrew

SWIFT CURRENT, SK Rudy Dyck from just outside of Swift Current has taken control of a large potato farm this week and refuses to share power with anyone else. “This is not one of them […]

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