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Unger Games

Winnipeg Jets Trade for the Wrong Toews

January 23, 2023 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Rumours have been swirling for weeks that Chicago Blackhawks superstar Jonathan Toews might be on the trading block, and what better place for him to land than in his hometown of Winnipeg. Unfortunately […]

Unger Games

Winnipeg Man Hospitalized After Dangerous Fall from Jets’ Bandwagon

January 20, 2023 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Area man Paul Kroeker, 51, was rushed to the hospital last night after a dangerous fall off the Winnipeg Jets’ bandwagon. “Jets suck! Fire Hellebuyck! Jets suck!” yelled Kroeker, as paramedics loaded him […]

Unger Suspicion

Philadelphia Flyers Shore Up Blue Line By Signing Patriarch Kirill of Moscow

January 19, 2023 Andrew

PHILADELPHIA, PA In a surprise move this afternoon, the Broad Street Bullies have inked Patriach Kirill of Moscow to play alongside Ivan Provorov and Gritty on the blue line. “We felt that young Provorov just […]

Unger Suspicion

Regina and Saskatoon Merge to Attract IKEA and a Hockey Team

January 16, 2023 Andrew

RESASKAGINA, SK Two medium-sized cities in Saskatchewan some 300 kms apart are planning to merge into one slightly larger city in an effort to attract an IKEA and maybe even an NHL team. “We can […]

Unger Games

Ovechkin Gifts Putin with Record-Setting Puck

December 27, 2022 Andrew

MOSCOW, RUSSIA Just moments after an empty net goal put him second all-time in career goals, Capitals star Alexander Ovechkin tossed the historic puck into a manila envelope, slapped on a couple stamps, and mailed […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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