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friesen

The Daily Bonnet

Winnipeg Welcomes New Law Firm ‘Friesen Froese Harder’

February 6, 2025 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Mennonites across Manitoba are excited about the new law firm Friesen Froese Harder that just opened up this week on Henderson Highway. “It was minus 35 on the day of our grand opening,” […]

The Daily Bonnet

Friesens Blamed for Manitoba’s Harsh Winters

November 28, 2024 Andrew

ALTONA, MB A recent study showed that Friesen was the most common surname in Manitoba, beating out such favourites as Wiebe, Klassen, and even Smith. The study came as no surprise for local meteorologists who […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman Has Friesen Toews

January 21, 2024 Andrew

ROSTHERN, SK After a cold snap in Rosthern, Saskatchewan, Mrs. Anita Friesen has resorted to double and even triple-socking her feet to prevent her Toews from Friesen. “My Toews Froese Fast,” said Friesen. “They were […]

Unger the Influence

Manitoba Plans to Have 2 Million Friesens By the Year 2030

September 18, 2023 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Conservative leader Heather Stefanson has laid out her aggressive plan to increase Manitoba’s population to 2 million people by the year 2030 using the province’s most efficient reproduction machine: Friesens. “Really, I’m just […]

The Daily Bonnet

Hottest Day in History Has Mr. Friesen Considering a Name Change

July 8, 2023 Andrew

ROSTHERN, SK Days after scientists reported the hottest day in the earth’s history, area man Dick Friesen is considering changing his name to “more accurately reflect the current state of affairs.” “Diewel, it’s hot out,” […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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