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faspa

Unger & Thirst

Archaeologists Uncover ‘Mennonite Faspa’ Frozen in Pompeii Ash

December 29, 2020 Andrew

NAPLES, ITALY A newly uncovered food stall frozen in time in the ruined city of Pompeii reveals that ancient Romans had a penchant for fresh Bothwell cheese curds and rolled up slices of ham held […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Man Sours the Mood at Local Funeral by Hoarding All the Pickles and Decaf

October 24, 2020 Andrew

GREENLAND, MB Thousands of Toewses descended on Greenland, Manitoba this week for the latest Toews funeral and were shocked to discover the absence of dill pickles. “Okay, so I’ve got my cubed cheese, deli meat […]

Unger & Thirst

Local Church to Host Weekly ‘Superspreader Potluck’

October 16, 2020 Andrew

SCHRATJLIJCH, ON The Schratjlijch Gospel Church is spreading more than just the good news this week after Pastor Dave announced the congregation would be hosting a weekly ‘Superspreader Potluck’ starting this Sunday at 12:30 right […]

Unger & Thirst

“Immodest” Mennonite Woman Leaves Her Zwieback Out for All to See

August 30, 2020 Andrew

OSTERWICK, MB Residents of Osterwick were in shock this afternoon after a fresh and delectable zwieback baked by Mrs. Loewen was left out on the table in the church basement all afternoon. “It’s simply not […]

The Daily Bonnet

There’s No Reimer Friesen for Mennonite Man’s Actions

June 13, 2019 Andrew

ALTONA, MB Mr. Dueck was behaving very strangely during faspa on Sunday afternoon. His behaviour was so unusual, in fact, that other guests said there was absolutely no Reimer Friesen for it. “I get it, […]

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