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faspa

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Man Leaves Faspa Early to Avoid Cleaning Up the Chairs

June 24, 2026 Andrew

WINKLER, MB At faspa this week, James Dueck, 37, of Winkler scrambled out of the church gymnasium just as soon as he’d wolfed down his cheese curds and dills. The reason? He was sick and […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman Spends 8 Hours Trying to Extract Stubborn Pickles at Top of Jar

September 9, 2024 Andrew

COALDALE, AB Area woman Diane Toews got up early this morning knowing she was going to need a bit of extra time to extract the pickles, but it was all for naught. “Faspa was over […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman Gets Finger Trapped in Rolled-Up Slice of Faspa Ham

September 2, 2024 Andrew

FRIEDENSFELD, MB The annual Heppner gathering in Friedensfeld this week required emergency intervention after Aunt Tina got her finger caught in a rolled-up ham slice. “I’ve been warning people about those ham slices for decades,” […]

Unger Conviction

Church Basement Chair Recruited To Help Change Lightbulb

August 16, 2024 Andrew

MOUNTAIN LAKE, MN How many Mennonites does it take to change a lightbulb? Two … plus one of those wooden church basement chairs. For centuries Mennonites have called upon the wooden church basement chair to […]

Unger Suspicion

Toronto Argos Celebrate Victory with Reception in Mennonite Church Basement

November 21, 2022 Andrew

TORONTO, ON The Grey Cup-winning Toronto Argonauts gathered at the South Toronto Mennonite Church basement this afternoon for a lovely celebration that included a delightful array of buns with jam and several fans. “Thanks, everyone, […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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