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Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Families Camp Overnight for Mother’s Day Buffet

May 11, 2024 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Dozens of families spilled out into neighbouring canola fields this evening in anticipation of tomorrow’s Mother’s Day buffet at the MHV. “Oba, look at those Kroekers way in the back there,” said Mrs. […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Calls Mother-in-Law “Hey You” to Avoid Calling Her “Mom”

February 26, 2024 Andrew

ALTONA, MB For more than fifteen years, area man Steve Plett, 37, has awkwardly navigated the strange terrain of just what the heck to call his mother-in-law. “When Jess and I got married, my mother-in-law […]

Unger Suspicion

All Air Canada Flights to be Equipped with Screaming Infants

September 4, 2023 Andrew

TORONTO, ON Starting this fall, the coach section of every Air Canada flight will come fully equipped with a minimum of one very agitated baby. “It’s just one more way we can better service our […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Barely Recognizes Cousin He Hasn’t Seen Since Before the Pandemic

August 8, 2022 Andrew

LA CRETE, AB After not having seen his closest cousin in more than two years, local man Bob Peters walked right past cousin Tim in the knackzoat aisle at the Walmart this past week. “Oba […]

Unger & Thirst

New Reports Claims Children Just Faking It, Most Absolutely Love Broccoli and Brussels Sprouts

June 4, 2022 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON A new Health Canada study shows that kids have been fooling us the entire time. According to research, Canadian children report broccoli, brussels sprouts, and green peppers among their absolute favourite foods. “It […]

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