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bernie sanders

Unger Suspicion

In Trying Times, Americans Always Put Forward Their Very Brightest and Best

April 8, 2020 Andrew

WASHINGTON, DC In these dark and challenging times the American people have scoured the nation to find the very best two possible candidates to lead the country through this difficult period. “Normally we just pick […]

Unger Suspicion

Mennonite Man Really Excited to Vote for Colonel Sanders in 2020

February 21, 2019 Andrew

ELKHART, IN Local Mennonite youth pastor Peter Detweiler, 31, of Elkhart was “super pumped” when he heard on Wednesday that Colonel Sanders has announced his candidacy for President of the United States. “I’ve been a […]

Unger Suspicion

Mennonite Man Still ‘Feeling the Bern’

May 23, 2016 Andrew

GOESSEL, KS Mennonite deacon and family man Larry Hiebert, 33, is desperately holding onto any last thread of hope that Bernie Sanders has of winning the Democratic nomination. Hiebert was at the front of the crowd when Sanders […]

Unger Suspicion

Bernie Sanders’s Mittens Sworn in as President of the United States

May 2, 2016 Andrew

WASHINGTON, DC A pair of delightful mittens worn by Bernie Sanders were sworn in as President of the United States earlier today. “I’m going to be a President for all Americans, not just those with […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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