The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

beard

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Man Shaves Beard into Goatee to Become Youth Pastor

April 24, 2017 Andrew

MORDEN, MB Local man Peter Berg of Morden has recently shaved his full manly beard into a goatee in preparation for his new job as youth pastor of the South Morden Brethren Church. “You can’t […]

Unger Suspicion

Mennonite Man Insists His Beard is Not a Tribute to Fidel Castro

November 26, 2016 Andrew

SASKATOON, SK A Mennonite man is facing considerable scrutiny today for sporting a beard that looks eerily similar to that of recently departed Cuban dictator Fidel Castro. “It’s just a beard,” said Ben F. Toews […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Has ‘Unfair Head Start’ on Movember Beard

November 2, 2016 Andrew

LA CRETE, AB A local Mennonite man has taken advantage of his ample facial hair to “totally kick butt” in a local Movembeard contest. “Like Samson of old, I have not, cannot, and will not shave,” said […]

Posts pagination

« 1 2 3
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Delusional Mennonite Man Thinks His Mom’s Vereniki are Better than Your Mom’s Vereniki
    September 6, 2019
  • Couple Who Never Left Resort for Even a Second Claim to Have “Visited Mexico”
    April 4, 2025
  • Dishes are Miraculously Washed as Mennonite Man Naps on Sunday Afternoon
    February 18, 2018
  • Local Man Turns 40, or 65 in ‘Mennonite Years’
    November 9, 2019
  • Mennonite Uncle Barred from Thanksgiving Gathering after Forgetting His ID and Vax Card
    October 10, 2021

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2026 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved