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baking

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman Tries to Pass Off Blueberry Pie as Saskatoon Pie

June 30, 2020 Andrew

NEUANLAGE, SK Mrs. Krahn is in hot water this week after bringing what clearly was a blueberry pie to the Neuanlage soup and pie fundraiser and labelling it “Saskatoon berry pie.” “Who does she think […]

Unger & Thirst

Mrs. Janzen’s Day Old Buns a Big Hit with Frugal Mennonites

June 7, 2020 Andrew

FRESNO, CA Mennonites across the region have been clamouring to get their hands on Mrs. Janzen’s day old buns, which she offers for a significantly discounted price. “Every loves Mrs. Janzen’s buns,” said Mr. Fehr. […]

Unger & Thirst

Vegetables Left Untouched After Mennonite Woman Brings Nanaimo Bars

May 4, 2020 Andrew

NANAIMO, BC When the Friesens moved out to Vancouver Island to retire in 1998, little did they know that they’d spend their golden years indulging on sweet treats that their Prairie Mennonite stomachs could only […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman Shunned for Not Making Her Own Crusts

January 21, 2020 Andrew

WATERLOO, ON Mrs. Eby is facing intense scrutiny this week after it was revealed she hasn’t made her own crust since 1987. “Ach, why bother making a crust from scratch when you can buy a […]

Unger & Thirst

Manitoba Woman Totally Baffled by ‘Honour System’ in Kitchener

July 11, 2019 Andrew

KITCHENER, ON Mrs. Unrau of Winnipeg was visiting friends in southern Ontario who insisted the local butter tarts at City Café Bakery were even better than what she could get back home. “I must say, […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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