Completely Predictable Mennonite Couple Places Garbage Can Under the Sink

WINKLER, MB

The first thing that newlyweds Andrew and Katie Unrau did when they moved into their new home in Winkler was put the garbage can under the sink “like it should be.”

“There was a lot of discussion about where the cutlery should go or what direction the Chesterfield should face,” explained Katie, “but when it came to figuring out where the garbage can should go, the answer was clear: under the sink, of course!”

The Unraus are continuing a five-century-long Mennonite tradition of placing the trash bin in the most convenient location possible.

“Sometimes we visited Baptists and Presbyterian friends in the city and it’s absolutely impossible to find the garbage!” exclaimed Katie who spent more than forty minutes trying to dispose a used Kleenex at a friend’s house recently. “I mean, what’s with these people. It’s like they’re trying to waste my time on purpose!”

Other people apparently keep stuff like Mr. Clean and Windex below the sink and keep their trash in it’s own special foot-powered receptacle somewhere else in the house.

“Those Englishers are all messed up…and in more ways than just their mode of baptism!” said Katie. “I question the sanity of anyone who would put their garbage can in any other place!”

Katie Unrau will be leading the discussion at the adult Sunday School class this week where the topic of garbage cans under the sink will be discussed at great length.

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