The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

Unger Conviction

Offering Plate is Always Mysteriously Empty After it Passes By Old Mr. Klassen’s Row

December 11, 2016 Andrew

ALT-BERGFELD, MB Ushers at Alt-Bergfeld Mennonite Church are baffled by how utterly empty the offering plate is whenever it passes by Mr. Klassen’s row. “We just can’t figure it out,” said Mr. Friesen. “I’ve ushered […]

The Daily Bonnet

Dad Kills Deer With the Car, Tells Horrified Children ‘Bambi’s Just Having Meddachschlop’

December 10, 2016 Andrew

REINLAND, MB On a family outing to Kenora this past weekend, local dad Arnold Koop of Reinland smacked right into a deer with the family Caravan. While the carnage seemed to horrify his young family, the […]

The Daily Bonnet

2016 Mennonite Christmas Shopping Guide – Ten Thousand Villages vs. Wal-Mart

December 10, 2016 Andrew

With the Christmas season fast approaching, Mennonites around the globe are faced with a quite the quandary about where to spend their holiday dollars (or guaraní). On the one hand, Mennonites are more-or-less obliged to get the […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Blows Entire Paycheque at Cabela’s

December 9, 2016 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Local father and outdoor enthusiast Peter Neufeld, 41, is drawing criticism from family and friends after blowing his entire November paycheque on hunting and fishing stuff this past weekend. “I really wish he would […]

Quizzes

Vote Now To Determine Which Side is Jantsied!

December 9, 2016 Andrew

After almost a century-and-a-half of furious debate, Mennonites on both sides of the Red River have still not yet determined which side is the “other side.” Instead, residents in the West declare that their side […]

Posts pagination

« 1 … 688 689 690 … 740 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Old Dutch Releases New ‘Rapple Chaps’
    October 12, 2020
  • Beach Boys Record New Hit: “I Wish They All Could Be Chihuahua Girls”
    August 27, 2022
  • Argos Destroy Patriots 28-5
    July 23, 2022
  • A Modest Proposal for the Elimination of Faspa
    March 11, 2018
  • World’s Most Innovative Mennonite Woman Puts Sweet and Sour Sauce on Her Farmer Sausage
    March 26, 2022

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2026 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved