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The Daily Bonnet

Long Lost Cousin Goes Up During Freiwilliges and Ruins the Whole Thing

July 17, 2019 Andrew

WINKLER, MB When Grandma Enns passed away this week dozens of long lost cousins made an appearance at the Winkler MBEMC church. One such person was Peter Enns, 41, who hadn’t been seen in years […]

Unger Games

Desperate Winnipeg Jets Recruiting Farm Boys Near Kleefeld

July 16, 2019 Andrew

KLEEFELD, MB After losing player after player to free agency this summer, the Winnipeg Jets have had to get a little creative to fill their roster for next season. “We’re basically going out into the […]

Unger Suspicion

7 Signs Your Co-Worker was at Folk Fest this Weekend

July 15, 2019 Andrew

Oba, nay! So some of the Englishers yet have been going to the Bard’s Hell Park over there for the Vanapag Folks Festival. I know that no good Mannanites were there, especially since they need […]

Unger Games

Fred Penner and Al Simmons to Square Off in World Heavyweight Title

July 14, 2019 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Popular local children’s entertainers Fred Penner and Al Simmons will square off this fall to determine the World Heavyweight Champion. “I’ve got a lot of beefing up to do before then,” said Juno […]

Unger Conviction

Affluent Attention-Starved Couple Lodges Complaint Against Pastor for Not Visiting them as Often as Actual People in Need

July 13, 2019 Andrew

WINKLER, MB A local couple, the Penners, has filed a complaint against Pastor Dan for not visiting them as much as Mrs. Wiebe who’s been stricken with a terminal illness and Mr. Plett who’s been […]

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