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Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman Walks Around All Day with Kale in Her Teeth

August 5, 2019 Andrew

NORTH KILDONAN, MB Susan Dueck, 43, of North Kildonan has been walking up and down Henderson Highway today doing her errands with a huge piece of kale in her teeth. The embarrassing piece of kale […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Man Hospitalized After Eating Too Far Into the Green Part

August 4, 2019 Andrew

MANITOBA COLONY, MEXICO Mr. Wiebe had to be rushed to the hospital in Cuauhtemoc this week after he failed to heed the warnings of all those around him and ate well into the green part. […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Discovers Farmer’s Tan in His Plumber’s Crack

August 4, 2019 Andrew

LA CRETE, AB Scientists have flocked to the northern Alberta town of La Crete this week after a distinct farmer’s tan was discovered in a local man’s plumber’s crack. “Mr. Klassen is a wonder to […]

Unger Conviction

Ms. Anna Baptist to Bring the Word this Sunday

August 3, 2019 Andrew

LANCASTER, PA The congregation at Lancaster Mennonite Church is very pleased to announce that world famous Ms. Anna Baptist will be bringing the Word this Sunday. “I’ve heard so much about this Anna Baptist. It’ll […]

Unger Suspicion

Mennonite Grandma Now Has More Subs than PewDiePie after Signing Up All Her Relatives

August 2, 2019 Andrew

CORN, OK After a string of hilarious videos and video game-commentaries, Mrs. Kroeker of the small town of Corn, Oklahoma has now passed PewDiePie for the most popular YouTuber in the world. “What can I […]

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