Mennonite Woman Consumes 4L of Ice Cream Just for the Pail


Mrs. Braun was so desperate for a fresh used ice cream pail that she downed four litres of Foremost chocolate ice cream in one epic evening.

“I was looking at my collection of storage containers and I said to myself, ‘Helen, you’re running low,'” explained Mrs. Braun. “I had no choice but to run over to the local Co-ops and fetch myself a pail and then eat the entire thing in one sitting.”

Wanting to keep her stock of ‘Mennonite Tupperware’ at a sufficient level for this fall’s potluck season, Mrs. Braun intends to eat a 4L container of ice cream every couple days for the duration of the summer.

“My Tjnals can help, but only if he’s willing to do the dishes,” said Mrs. Braun. “Otherwise it’s just me, five hours of ‘Tiger King’, and a bucket of Neapolitan!”

Mrs. Braun insists that it’s not about the ice cream per se, but about the container left afterwards.

“The pail is half the value at least,” said Mrs. Braun. “Most of the time I’m rinsing it out and filling it with potato salad before I even get all the way to the bottom.”

Meanwhile, Tjnals Braun plans to knack tonnes and tonnes of zoat this summer, just so he has enough shells to patch the holes in his driveway.

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