Jantsied Extends Border Closure with Ditsied


After receiving pressure from the authoritarian regime over in Jantsied, government officials in neutral Rosenort have extended the border closure between the two warring nations.

“The iron curtain between between Jantsied and Ditsied will be impenetrable this holiday season,” said Schulz Schultz of Rosenort. “It’s sad to see, but the two zones are so ideologically opposed they simply can’t get along. I mean the one side says vereni-ka and the other says vereni-cha.”

Tensions rose between the two sieds after a faction in Ditsied allowed a foreign power to set up massive manure spreaders pointed right at Jantsied.

“Well, you know, but they’ve got their manure spreaders pointed at us, too,” said Distied Secretary General Erik Kroeker. “But I guarantee to you, we will beat them to the moon!”

Some locals have tried to sneak through the border, but so far there has been no luck.

“I’ve got frintschoft over there that I haven’t seen since last Christmas,” said Mrs. Loewen. “Well, that’s just as well. I’ll send them a cheque.”

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