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Unger Suspicion

Unger Suspicion

American Universities to Shut Down and Be Replaced With Nothing But YouTube and Memes

August 28, 2020 Andrew

WASHINGTON, DC American universities will be shuttering their doors this week as people flock to much more reliable sources of knowledge: random crap found on the Internet. Rather than being educated by qualified experts in […]

Unger Suspicion

“Fearless” Man Refuses to Wear a Mask But Absolutely Petrified to Enter a Grocery Store Without His Gun

August 25, 2020 Andrew

SEMINOLE, TX Mr. Janzen, 41, of Seminole, laughs every time he sees those “sheeple” wearing their silly masks all over the place. Janzen is a very brave man who trusts only in the Lord and […]

Unger Suspicion

Paris Woman Suddenly Realizes She Actually Likes Tourists

August 24, 2020 Andrew

PARIS, FRANCE After six months of nearly empty streets in her home town, Juliette Martin, 31, of Paris, France has decided that if the tourists ever come back she’s going to be nice to them […]

Unger Suspicion

Retired Threshing Machine Takes Up New Full-Time Advertising Job

August 20, 2020 Andrew

DOMINION CITY, MB One old threshing machine in Dominion City has managed to snag the retirement job of his dreams – a full time advertising job at the side of a gravel road. “It’s not […]

Unger & Thirst

Trudeau Hires Mennonites to Administer New $900 Million Roll Kuchen Grant Program

August 19, 2020 Andrew

PLUM COULEE, MB The Trudeau government has just announced a plan to have a few Mennonites from Plum Coulee administer a new $900 million grant program that will provide roll kuchen and syrup to eligible […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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