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Unger Suspicion

Unger Suspicion

AOL Ends Dial-Up Internet Mere Days After Mennonite Man Signed Up For It

August 13, 2025 Andrew

NEWTON, KS Area man Bob Unruh was excited to join the Internet age this week only to discover a couple days later that his snazzy new dial-up connection was being cut off. “Oba, America Online? […]

Unger Suspicion

Area Resident Proves His Worth as a Man by Removing Muffler from Car

August 11, 2025 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Local car enthusiast Sammy Fehr, 29, has successfully demonstrated his manhood this week after removing the muffler from his Honda Civic. “I’ve been single by whole life. I can’t believe I never figured […]

Unger Suspicion

Martyrs Mirror to Add New Chapter on Sean Feucht

August 9, 2025 Andrew

ABBOTSFORD, BC With legions of fans and a net-worth in the millions, worship leader Sean Feucht is clearly among the most persecuted Christians on the planet right now. “Everywhere they go in Canada, they keep […]

Unger Suspicion

Daring Mennonite Couple Get Married on Long Weekend

August 3, 2025 Andrew

SASKATOON, SK Laura Sawatzky, 22, and Nick Barkman, 23, tied the knot this long weekend to a completely empty church. “Even our witnesses didn’t show up,” said Laura. “Apparently they would rather be at the […]

Unger Suspicion

Robots Caught on Kiss Cam at Björk Concert

July 31, 2025 Andrew

REYKJAVIK, ICELAND It was an embarrassing moment for two androids at a Björk concert this week, as they were caught in full embrace on the kiss cam. “I really don’t like to embarrass people or […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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